Today's news on employment was bad, unquestionably. So, we need to get the jokes ready in case the recession is longer and worse than recessions have been in the last two decades. (Incidentally, I think that OPEC deserves most of the blame for this recession.)
We could recycle some old jokes. Here's a famous one:
"How bad is the recession in New Jersey?"
"So bad that the Mafia is laying off judges."
Let's adapt that joke to Washington state. The first line is the same:
"How bad is the recession in Washington state?"
(Or, if you prefer, in Seattle, or King County, or wherever.)
I've thought of a couple of possible second lines:
(1) "So bad that the UW is laying off "studies" professors."
(2) "So bad that the WEA is laying off lobbyists."
But you can probably think of better endings than those two.
(Fun fact: One New Jersey governor, Brendan Byrne, if I recall correctly, was elected partly because a tape surfaced in which one Mafia figure was explaining to another that it was impossible to bribe the man. New Jersey voters took this as evidence of good character, from someone in a good position to know. Byrne was not a good governor, though he was more honest than many New Jersey politicians.)
Posted by Jim Miller at December 05, 2008 12:43 PM | Email ThisEven worse than the Governor we just re-elected that ushered it in in the first place.
Posted by: Rick D. on December 5, 2008 01:09 PM"It's now a capital offense to play poker online."
Posted by: Easycure on December 5, 2008 01:48 PM"How bad is the recession in Michigan?"
"So bad that the UAW finally agreed that workers must actually WORK to earn $75,000 a year." (as opposed to "job banking").
or--
"So bad that the UAW is agreeing that GM only has to pay one guy to do a one-person job instead of two guys working a one-person job!"
Posted by: Mickey on December 5, 2008 01:50 PMAs soon as Pelosi announced limited drilling and the B/B Boys figured out the weak dollar was raping our wallets the price started to come down. These actions could have happened two years ago and we could have saved everybody a 401(k) or two. As an aside, the high price of oil is what started the housing implosion by inflating heat and gas costs for families already living on the edge (and amateur house flippers) and that tipped all of those shaky (zero down, liar loans, interest only) loans into default.
Once again, as in most of the problems of this magnitude, it was all caused by the screwballs we elect.
"Hello there, I'm from the government and I'm here to help." Ha, ha, ha!!
Posted by: G Jiggy on December 5, 2008 02:21 PMFunny stuff.
Posted by: G Jiggy on December 5, 2008 02:25 PMHey Jim. Last month 1/2 million plus Americans lost their jobs. And you want to make funny?
I bet you pray every night that our economy here in Washington collapses too, so you can try to blame "liberals" and "unions", for the melt down conservative / trickle down / deregulating economic policies have caused. Now come on. Tell the truth. All the voices in your head tell you the "liberals", or (sic) Opec caused this melt down. Not putting Republicons in charge.
You are one sick puppy Jim. Arrogance. The only redeeming quality of anyone sick enough to still call themselves a Republican.
I blame Reagan, and Bush, with all his enablers, and supporters for this meltdown. I'm talking about you. You can blame OPEC, The Tooth Fairy, Unions, or even Erin Brockovich if you want.
A half million Americans losing their jobs, funny? I think not. You making fun of them? Sick.
Posted by: All Facts Support My Positions on December 5, 2008 02:37 PMWhich is why your raving loon arse should seek professional psychological help.
Posted by: Rick D. on December 5, 2008 02:47 PMSheesh the Kerry campaign back in 2004 claimed the economy was the "worst since the Depression". It was just a bit of an exaggeration. But liberals never lie, do they?
"facts" and the other leftist trolls here love any kind of economic trouble because they think it's an opportunity for them to impose their socialist dreams.
It's not exactly going to work out that way and even Obama knows it...unless he wants to be a 1-term President.
Posted by: Bill Cruchon on December 5, 2008 02:54 PMThey haven't a clue.
Posted by: Bill Cruchon on December 5, 2008 03:00 PMJokes help us keep perspective, and help keep our morale up. Those are both good for those who now have to look for jobs. (I will do other things to help, such as trying to persuade Dave Ross, and others who share his views, to buy American cars.)
Now, would future commenters please ignore the earlier humorless comments, and go back to raising morale by finding better endings to that joke. Don't even reply to the humorless.
Incidentally, if anyone has some good Will Rogers jokes from the 1930s, now might be a good time to share them.
Posted by: Jim Miller on December 5, 2008 03:03 PMAs a local note, near my home in Lake City Will Rogers played his last game of polo before he and pilot Wiley Post parished in an airplane accident in Alaska. Back in the 1930's there were numerous stables in the area. There is a monument to this now near the Lake City library but it isn't at the actual location.
I'm going from memory but I believe Will Rogers once said, "I'm not a member of any organized political party. I'm a Democrat".
Posted by: Bill Cruchon on December 5, 2008 03:13 PM"It's so bad that, according to All Facts Support My Positions, it was caused by Reagan, who hasn't been in office for 20 years!"
Now that's power, from beyond the grave! Maybe Nancy was right about that seance thing.
Posted by: Steve on December 5, 2008 03:13 PM"Facts", let me guess - Will Rogers never met you, did he?
Posted by: deedub on December 5, 2008 03:15 PM"Alexander Hamilton started the U.S.Treasury with nothing, and that was the closest our country has ever been to being even."
Posted by: Camille on December 5, 2008 03:21 PM
A fool and his money are soon elected.
A man only learns in two ways, one by reading, and the other by association with smarter people.
A remark generally hurts in proportion to its truth.
About all I can say for the United States Senate is that it opens with a prayer and closes with an investigation.
Advertising is the art of convincing people to spend money they don't have for something they don't need.
Alexander Hamilton started the U.S. Treasury with nothing, and that was the closest our country has ever been to being even.
All I know is just what I read in the papers, and that's an alibi for my ignorance.
America is becoming so educated that ignorance will be a novelty. I will belong to the select few.
An economist's guess is liable to be as good as anybody else's.
(One of my favorites)
Ancient Rome declined because it had a Senate, now what's going to happen to us with both a House and a Senate?
Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for.
Posted by: Diogenes on December 5, 2008 03:26 PM
I love that one too.
One thing I've learned about investing over the years is that nobody is an expert.
Posted by: Bill Cruchon on December 5, 2008 04:11 PMIn the meantime, others are suffering the real estate downfall with shock and dismay.
Posted by: Ragnar Danneskjold on December 5, 2008 04:26 PMWhat is it with that guy? He appears to be constantly spewing saliva every time he opens his mouth. Beyond my political differences with the man he just creeps me out.
Posted by: Bill Cruchon on December 5, 2008 04:34 PMIt is called the Bush Depression.
Posted by: All Facts Support My Positions on December 5, 2008 04:46 PMSo the real number of people who needs jobs is between 15% and 20% of American workers.
Let's hear some more jokes. I suggest you forward them straight to the White House. I know they are laughing a lot these days. Bring em on!
Posted by: All Facts Support My Positions on December 5, 2008 04:54 PMI just love the feigned outrage you little drip.
Posted by: G Jiggy on December 5, 2008 05:07 PMhttp://www.pdc.wa.gov/archive/compliance/complaints/pdf/2008/realtors.pdf
Rossi, McKenna, and his real estate friends may soon be prosecuted..... You know. Breaking them law things.
Dooooof
So when will Rossi, and McKenna be prosecuted? Oh, I forgot. Republicons don't have to follow laws. Laws are for the"little" people right?
Posted by: All Facts Support My Positions on December 5, 2008 05:58 PMI mean in a general sense. Otherwise this discussion is nearly meaningless. Let's see why you believe what you believe.
Simply ask them to identify what it is they do for a living. It need not be any more intrusive that that.
It's almost magic. They vaporize!
Posted by: Bill Cruchon on December 5, 2008 06:17 PMI love getting my political spin from people that don't have to lie.....
Posted by: All Facts Support My Positions on December 5, 2008 06:21 PMJust what sort of business do you own?
Perhaps we could do business.
Posted by: Bill Cruchon on December 5, 2008 06:29 PM$10 says it's a porn cite.
Either that or he deals pot.
Posted by: cliff on December 5, 2008 06:39 PMMaybe we conservatives ought to pat ourselves on the back a bit here. We don't have to lie and make up stuff and pretend we are not who we are.
Liberals like "facts" and "cato" do.
Posted by: Bill Cruchon on December 5, 2008 06:44 PMIf I was some kind of fraud, I would be like Faux News Propaganda saying they are Fair and Balanced. I guarantee, I am not. Show up at drinking liberally. I stop by once or twice a month....
I will admit, this is the worst year my business has had in quite a while. Not really Bush's fault. Lots of competition these days.
Posted by: All Facts Support My Positions on December 5, 2008 06:50 PM"Facts" ~ The Olbermann and Madcow show I believe. That is why you're so full of hate and angst.
Will you admit blaming Reagan for our current economic crisis is not only absurd, it's downright ignorant? He hasn't been in office since 1988 (20 years by my math) and he's been dead for 3+ years. Prove your not a troll and admit that was an inane comment to make.
Posted by: Rick D. on December 5, 2008 06:51 PMI'll go out on a limb here and say "facts" is a lying, pathetic pile of garbage.
I'll also say that "facts" is probably the same idiot that posts here as "cato". Maybe not but the MO seems remarkably similar.
I will also say without reservation that "facts" and probably "cato" are phonies who refuse to have an honest debate about political issues.
I have a fitness consulting business, perhaps we can hook up to our mutual benefit. Talk to me.
Posted by: Bill Cruchon on December 5, 2008 07:03 PMI love getting my political spin from people that don't have to lie."
Best joke so far. It reminds me of the man who hated to get wet, so he took three showers a day. And the joke was done beautifully, with just the right deadpan tone.
And, now I am going to close the thread because the comments have stopped being funny.
But I will add this reminder for my friends: In general, it is best to ignore trolls, unless you can make fun of them.
Posted by: Jim Miller on December 5, 2008 07:06 PM