March 06, 2007
Environmentalism has a funny side

In this case, an absolutely hilarious one. I can't comment much more because I'm too busy laughing. See this article, via Drudge (Fair Warning: if talk about sex offends you, don't click the link...of course by saying that I'm driving people to the article...oh, never mind).

A couple highlights:

Other ways of "greenwashing" the bedroom, as outlined by TreeHugger and Greenpeace, include turning out the lights, not buying PVC or vinyl accoutrements, ensuring S&M paddles are made from sustainably harvested timber, using organic massage oils, showering together, using bamboo bed sheets (they come from a rapidly renewable resource and are said to be "super sexy"), and wearing lingerie made with renewable fibres such as hemp (Enamore), bamboo (Butta) and other organic goodness (GreenKnickers, Buenostyle, Peau Ethique).

Unbearably funny. What's next, biodegradable sex toys?

Never fear, it gets better: "Gordon notes there's even an eco-friendly adult website dedicated to naked vegetarians, appropriately called Veg Porn."

Um, ok. Go find the link yourself. I'm not dealing with it.

In the meantime, as scary as it sounds, this should receive some coverage at Savage Love (another link not for those with delicate sensitivities). Odd greenie ideas merge with sex in the modern age. Very Seattle.

Posted by Eric Earling at March 06, 2007 09:27 PM | Email This
Comments
1. Geoducks.

Posted by: starboardhelm on March 6, 2007 09:53 PM
2. Blast it Eric! I was in the process of almost thinking about posting a comment about this.
If any of the greenie chicks resemble anything like their female counterparts here in Seattle, I'll misquote George Carlin by saying I wouldn't engage in sexual relations with them even with a stolen male member. (Much more pithy in the Rated R version if you can do the translation)
*shudder*

Posted by: Reporterward on March 6, 2007 10:10 PM
3. Ah, Don! My, My! George Carlin? You just went up a notch in my esteem. Couldn't help but fill in the correct words when I read your misquotatation. Been a while since someone as funny as Carlin (including the post 70's Carlin himself) came along.

Posted by: deadwood on March 6, 2007 10:28 PM
4. blue movies, now green sex. reporterward, i'm so interested in red (state) sex- must you folks steal someone else's penis to have sex? or are you just taking a wild guess about the experience of having sex?

Posted by: cinco on March 6, 2007 11:29 PM
5. Cinco,

In my business, we see a lot of people naked. Green chicks are hairy and UGLY. Considering your particular, ah, bent, as it were, and the fact that green chicks are ugly, I wouldn't be at all surprised if eco-males were doing more than just hugging trees.

Don't forget your bamboo condom.

Posted by: ERNurse on March 6, 2007 11:59 PM
6. Too much fodder for too many jokes that would be too inappropriate to post...

Posted by: TB on March 7, 2007 12:22 AM
7. Here's a hot tip for "greener" love lives: Ditch the perfume and cologne (in public, especially, so the rest of us don't have to breathe it)---why? Because they are made from SOLVENTS. Yes, that's right---SOLVENTS. My very knowledgeable doctor confirms it. And yes those solvents when rubbed on the skin get absorbed into the system and then do their number on you. Solvents are carcinogens and immune system messer-uppers. Besides, the National Smell and Taste Institute a couple years back determined that men's cologne was one of the three biggest turn-off smells for women. Surprising, eh? (The other two were BBQ'd meat and cherries, interestingly enough). And I'm guessing that guys wear cologne to impress women. But ditch the cologne, guys, and then women won't be avoiding you to get away from the stench. We really do hate that stuff!
another hot tip for greener love lives--ditch the fabric softeners in your laundry (it's on your sheets, too, get it??). The petrochemically based oils in those things are neurotoxic (my doctor told me about that one, too). Funny what a lot of us hadn't known before.

Posted by: Michele on March 7, 2007 01:38 AM
8. Sex=Babies=More People=More Consumption=More GW.
Therefore Sex=GW

No such thing as Green Sex, no matter the precautions taken there will be a predictable number of people produced.

That is a bad thing, we need to reduce the population.

Celibacy for the Planet!!

That we can demographically win and put all this GW BS in the dust bin along with the next ice age, the Population Bomb and other left greenie fantasies.

Posted by: JCM on March 7, 2007 07:08 AM
9. #8. JCM

Can we start with David M first? LOL

Posted by: Army Medic/Vet on March 7, 2007 07:09 AM
10. Ha! Within a week the Goracle will be claiming he invented sex!

Posted by: katomar on March 7, 2007 07:10 AM
11. #10. KATOMAR


Please, that's not even FUNNY!

LOL..... oops

Posted by: Army Medic.Vet on March 7, 2007 07:12 AM
12. #8 JCM

Your formula is wrong...

Sex=Babies is incorrect in their world. Or incomplete actually...

Sex=Baby=Abortion Thus no more GW...

Thanks!
Greg

Posted by: Greg on March 7, 2007 07:26 AM
13. Greg,

We still win the demographic battle.

There will still be babies, they'll be too stoned on organic hemp to remember to keep the appointment, and the kid will end up in foster care in my house to be raised a good conservative.

Posted by: Greg on March 7, 2007 07:51 AM
14. I'm sorry OFF TOPIC...but I gave up HA long ago but they skulk around here and a good funny mocking would make me feel good on this rainy day.

An old man, Mr. Goldstein, was living the last of his life in a nursing home. One day he appeared to be very sad and depressed.

Nurse Darcy asked if there was anything wrong.

"Yes, Nurse Darcy," said Mr. Goldstein, "My Private Part died today, and I am very sad."

Knowing her patients were forgetful and sometimes a little crazy, she replied, "Oh, I'm so sorry, Mr. Goldstein, please accept my condolences."

The following day Mr. Goldstein was walking down the hall with his Private Part hanging out his pajamas, when he met Nurse Darcy.

"Mr. Goldstein," she said, "You shouldn't be walking down the hall like that. Please put your Private Part back inside your pajamas."

But, Nurse Darcy," replied Mr. Goldstein, "I told you yesterday that my Private Part died."

"Yes, you did tell me that, but why is it hanging out of your pajamas?"

(You gotta love this!!!!!!!!!!!)

> *
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"Well, he replied, "Today's the viewing."

Let the liberal outrage begin!

Posted by: Ragnar Danneskjold on March 7, 2007 08:25 AM
15. Greg - You almost hit it, but to tham: Sex = Fetus = Abortion (but only if it is hetero sex).

Posted by: krm on March 7, 2007 08:26 AM
16.
Imagine the rope burns from a hemp negligee...I suppose a corn husk would make a good condom (for me, at least, heh).

Posted by: John Bailo on March 7, 2007 10:18 AM
17. Hairy legged broads with globs of armpit hair and nasty attitudes towards men are not the issue. They don't use condoms. They are called "Rug-Munchers".

Posted by: dude on March 7, 2007 10:28 AM
18. They make special paddles for sex? I am learning something here! I figured people who were into that just used ping pong paddles or canoe paddles or spatulas or something ... Whatever happened to Reduce, REUSE, Recycle (?)

Posted by: Peggy U on March 7, 2007 12:10 PM
19. Peggy,

When I was a kid back in the early 50s my mom had a butter paddle hanging in the kitchen. It wasn't for S&M but it was used for spanking. And we kids knew it so it didn't get much use.

Dad didn't need a paddle.

Posted by: RBW on March 7, 2007 03:26 PM
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