November 29, 2006
Eat Turkey, Get Drunk, Have An Abortion (Or Vasectomy)

I read The Stranger so you don't have to. In the Nov. 23 issue, the Seattle alternative alternative weekly is again whoring for The Man (bar and nightclub advertisers), with a cover story on where family-averse misanthropes can booze up. The teaser is "Escape From Thanksgiving - Where To Drown Your Holiday Sorrows." Combined with the prominent cover art of an over-busty pre-op (?) trannie pigeon of sorts, the come-on certainly captures the jaded Seattle hipster's world view. Anything with intrinsic value (i.e. female sexuality, distilled spirits) must be slaked over the coals of disaffection or vulgarity. Inside, on p. 21, post-ironic post-holiday activity suggestions include abortion, vasectomy, mooning Santa and child abduction. In humor, true feelings often lie. Take The Stranger, here, on vasectomy and abortion.

(Under "The Rest Of The Weekend - Diversions For Holiday Visitors").

Get a vasectomy. Thanksgiving is over. Mom is sniffling; Dad is drunk. Your sister's being a sanctimonious pain in the ass and your brother - Christ, let's not even talk about him. What better time to resolve to end the absurd carnival of suffering called the human race. Snip, snip."

The name, address and phone of a clinic follow. Then there's this:

Get an abortion. Admit it. Being around your dysfunctional disaster of a family makes you question the wisdom of ever having kids. Enter Aradia Women's Health Clinic, which offers birth control, emergency contraception and abortion."

The address and phone number follow. It's just the spot for a date with the vacuum tubes. Aradia's outgoing head Marcy Bloom earlier this year declared to the Seattle Times that abortion was "normal and common" and "a moral good."

Birth control is of course quite legitimate, and one perhaps wishes it had been practiced on certain current denizens of Greater Seattle, though I suspect they might not agree. And personally, unlike many Sound Politics readers, I am reluctantly pro-choice, believing abortion is a weighty, often wrenching decision, but ultimately none of the government's business.

Yet to suggest vasectomy or abortion as merely two more tongue-in-cheek holiday weekend diversions - right along with boozing, dancing and clubbing - captures well the self-impressed nihilistic worldview that could spell demographic disaster for Democrats within several decades. Especially given that Republicans are red-hot breeding machines. Then again, if the relationship between Democrats and evangelicals deepens, who knows?

Posted by Matt Rosenberg at November 29, 2006 11:00 AM | Email This
Comments
1. Howsyoudoin,

I heard about a new male contraceptive...it's a pill dat a man can take two hours before he has sex and the woman can't be knocked up... the only problem is, as I see it, is... when do men know when they are going to have sex?


Forgetaboutit

Posted by: Joey bag of doughnuts on November 29, 2006 12:05 PM
2. Matt, you lack the satire gene. David Goldstein has been discussing this phenomenon in his blog and on his radio show lately. Check out his blog for recent posts on this topic.

Posted by: Luigi Giovanni on November 29, 2006 12:11 PM
3. Talk about a non-issue. A alternative weekly that prides itself on shocking people actually shocks someone. Amazing!

Truthfully, I'm surprised you even bother to look at The Stranger much less read it.

Posted by: Cato on November 29, 2006 12:33 PM
4. I sorely miss the days when the evangetards and fundies were total outsiders to the GOP and effectively told to get lost and form their own party. Their appropriation of the party was the worst thing that ever happened to it - those with sense quickly started to drift away to various strains of libertarian and have yet to get themselves organized into a cohesive political force while bible thumping morons continue to ruin whatever good may be left with being labeled a Republican.

Actually, there really isn't anything left to that name that old-guard conservatives value. Perhaps they should just change the name to something more appropriate, such as "Christian Empire" or "Theological Dynasty", or "Enforced Fundamentalist Morality"....

Posted by: H Moul on November 29, 2006 01:09 PM
5. Cato,

The Stranger is on honest rag! WYSIWG. It is far more reliable the the PI. It's a fringe / alternative publication and is up front about it. I rather read something I disagree with but is honest in presentation, than something that tries to pass as objective but has all to apparent agendas.

There was something to having 2 newspaper towns, 1 liberal 1 conservative, that lending to a more open and honest debate.

Posted by: JCM on November 29, 2006 01:40 PM
6. For those thinking of killing some time by going to the abortion clinic (pun somewhat intended) and even for those not going there, go to abort73.com, where you will get very educated on what an aborted baby looks like. They have to piece them together on the table after they pull the limbs & head etc. off, to make sure they "got it all." You will be shocked to see how human even a 7-week old baby looks. Feet, arms, eyes, digits, etc. They don't tell you that, do they? When you see the 16-week old baby dead on the table you will wonder how anyone could encourage anyone else to do such a thing to such a normal-looking, obviously human baby.
Each gruesome abortion procedure is described to the full with explicit drawings and some photos, in a way that abortion clinics won't even describe it on their websites. Partial birth aborts are horrifying, but my least favorite one of all is the dilation and evacuation, where they literally go in and first grab, twist and tear off a leg. Then the same to the other leg, then the arms. Limb by limb like that, until everything's grabbed, twisted, torn off and pulled out.
Most people who leave the abort73 website change their thinking about the whole darn subject forever. It is probably one of the most interesting and compelling websites I've ever been on.
Amazing how the Stranger is always trying to appeal to the worst in people. It's no accident.

Posted by: Me on November 29, 2006 02:09 PM
7. Here's one more tidbit to ponder, for those who've wondered what happens to all those aborted babies: I heard on a christian radio program recently a guy telling some of the death-back-to-life stories (more commonly called "near-death experiences") he'd collected and had found compelling. One concerned a little girl who'd died and gone to Heaven. When she "came back", she said to her parents "You never told me I had a brother." She said she met him in Heaven. Turns out the parents had had an abortion somewhere along the way and never told her. The fact that the parents were able to confirm the story suggests strongly that these babies just don't evaporate into the ether, never to be heard from again. They are real human souls who cannot be just be snuffed out, never to be heard from again. That one really opened my eyes. Next time someone tries to tell you these babies aren't yet human, tell them this story.

Posted by: Me on November 29, 2006 02:32 PM
8. Me,
Funny you should suggest that people should take a look-see for themselves...there is active resistance from the left in this country to allowing anyone to actually see what you are suggesting is worth a look. this is not surprizing though, this is part and parcel of how the left opperates and has always opperated.

Take for example this fellow, Walter Duranty's "work" which they accepted without question and pointed to as proof that the former Soviet paradise was none other than an engine of suffering the likes of which the world had never seen, and belittled others for even questioning the comunist's motives.

Actually what the left did was award him phoney ballony "honor" after "honor" in order to buttress his credentials (including a pulitzer prize which they damn well knew at the time it was awarded that it was a sham). they systematically and deliberately did this to use as a club to beat down those who would question Duranty's veracity or his motives.

The verdict is now in and it can no longer be doubted but what he is responsible for encouraging and perpetuating. uin the future we will also be able to look back on what these barbarians are promoted and place them in the same catagory as the former Soviets.

http://www.aim.org/aim_report/A107_0_4_0_C/

Posted by: JDH on November 29, 2006 03:13 PM
9. Stranger....alternative weekly is again whoring for The Man (bar and nightclub advertisers)

Call Lt. Eric Sano, vice commander, at SPD NOW! Investigating ads that some people find offensive is a top priority for SPD!! Remember the recent hooker sting predicated upon complaints about ads on Craig's List!!! As Sano said, "We're going to do this again and again and again."!!!!

Posted by: Tyler Durden on November 29, 2006 03:27 PM
10. Luigi,

I think that's a cop out. Good satire depends on a good satirist. The Stranger is not putting forth good satire, but instead half wishes that are poorly written in what appears to have been a dashed collective effort, possibly while drinking at a holiday party? Or maybe they were trying to one-up Michael Richards?

Dave Barry is good satire. There's no mistaking that it is satire and it's well written. Even David Goldstein has some good satire. But again, it's actually recognizable as satire and it has actual humor.

Most of these Stranger Diversions are recognizable under different descriptions: Poor taste and Not funny.

Posted by: Jeff B. on November 29, 2006 06:01 PM
11. Rosenberg- you are such a prig. that you could come to a partisan conclusion about democrats from this satirical holiday filler from the stranger helps explain why the Republicans won?t be gaining around here any time soon. Does anyone on this stiff little organ have posession of the sense of humor gene?
The stranger is not meant for you. It is for urban adults. Don?t read it for me, I?ll read it myself. Go back to fighting the War on Xmas with Bill O´Reilly and as he would say, SHUT UP!

Posted by: chuchie on November 29, 2006 07:51 PM
12. Chuchie (whoever you are), cheap shot.

As I wrote, "In humor, true feelings often lie." Satire is a political tool at The Stranger, always has been. You're in denial.

And as it happens, friend, I'm pro-choice, pro-transit (within reason), and a Seattle dweller - an actual "urban adult" to use your term, with a mortgage and kids. Although perhaps that's not how you'd define the term.

As far as your assertion I'm a shill for the conservative outrage over "The War On Christmas," that's rather humorous. Uh sorrry, but I've been on your side on this one for quite some time, and have taken some major hits at this site as a result. (I'll send you a link if you want, let me know).

Satire is often, usually even, political - and if you are telling me satire about abortion, vasectomy and family is devoid of political meaning, then I guess so is the Lenin statue in Fremont. Hey, it's next to a burrito stand. Conversation over, right?

The "it's only satire" riff is a cop-out for thoughtless juvenile liberals and "progressives" who help make Seattle less than it could be, and who don't want to face the consequences of their truly half-baked (or, make that one-sixth baked) value systems.

Happy Holidays, Compadre. And Viva Fidel (although he's dying).

Posted by: Matt Rosenberg on November 29, 2006 08:27 PM
13. The only funny commentary I ever saw connected to abortion was when the Dick Cheney hunting incident came about. A political cartoon showed a typical liberal woman wearing the pro-abort T-shirt, standing next to a TV set that was obviously airing a report on the Cheney hunting incident. Said woman was angrily pointing at the TV and shreiking "SOMEONE COULD HAVE BEEN KILLED!!!"

Posted by: Misty on November 29, 2006 09:01 PM
14. Here's another interesting site: silentscream.org
where one of the founders of NARAL shows a video of ultrasound showing a baby trying desparately get away from an abortionist's suction tube. It's heartbreaking and insightful. The founder is now appalled by abortion and apparently is trying to get word out about the truth of it.

Posted by: Me on November 30, 2006 12:44 AM
15. A cop-out for thoughtless juvenile liberals and progressives denial of their own half-baked value systems. That's funny. I just thought they was funny. I should have guessed the Stranger had an agenda. Dumb of me. Big Government and Big Liquor - the True and Evil Progenitors of misanthropic half assed values. Those Liberal mouthpieces will have it coming to them for a half century for putting tits on a turkey and advocating sex without children. Go get `em tiger.

Posted by: buzz on November 30, 2006 12:47 AM
16. Well no Buzz @15; read the whole post. If you already did and that's the most worthwhile comment you can leave, I'm saddened. The post was actually more about The Stranger's "satirical" and actually real, full-on embrace of abortion and vasectomy, and not having children - as clearly indicated in the headline as well as the full post. Yes abortion and vasectomy for The Stranger's predominantly 20-something readers are individual choices, but choices that nonetheless pose large consequences to consider.

Interesting how you skate past abortion by writing that The Stranger is simply "advocating sex without children." Condoms.... abortions....whatever, dude.

Abortion as a casual form of birth control. Sheesh......that's really..... progressive....really....urbane.........really....hip.

If you had bothered to click on the second-to-last link, for instance, you'd see that nationally, birth rates among liberal Democrats are badly lagging those of Republicans. Liberal political and social culture and the "satire" therein (go boozing and clubbing after Thanksgiving, oh, and get an abortion or vasectomy while you're at it) is part (part) of the backdrop.

Posted by: Matt Rosenberg on November 30, 2006 09:38 AM
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