October 02, 2006
Another Fatwa Coming? (Caption Contest)
Eventually, the Seattle Post-Intelligencer's chronic insolvency may no longer be papered over, via the Joint Operating Agreement with the Seattle Times. That's because the JOA could be declared null and void under its existing terms, in ongoing binding mediation. If so, the P-I will collapse like a house of cards, leaving a huge void in local print media: no more fashion show pix with grand political overtones. The P-I brings us this, below, from the runways in Paris today, by Belgian design firm A.F. Vandevorst. Some cojones on those designers, if you ask me. Time to fortify the Belgian embassy? Or is this a neener to Catholics? Go ahead and write your own caption. UPDATE: Top contenders so far....Obi-Wan: "U.S. Unveils New Gitmo Nurse Uniforms;" and The Real Mark: "Finally...a solution to the How To Date A Liberal Supermodel problem." Keep 'em comin'.
Posted by Matt Rosenberg at October 02, 2006
04:45 PM | Email This
1. That's easy....an Iraqi version of the Eastern Washington quiet motto for animal control among the gorgeous cowgirls..."shoot, shovel and shut-up."
Of course, the Iraqis shoot people, not cougars.
2. "Maria Cantwell's new line of clothing comes out Saturday. Trixie Jacobs (left) and Riza Evergreen show off the Catholic Burqa look".
3. Representatives of the LTFLB (Lab Technicians For Leg Freedom) came to negotiate new work dress standards but couldn't be understood.
4. "Proposed Bill Clinton presidential intern dress code - cigars optional"
5. Fashion Designers First To Comply With Muslim Demands For Female Dress Codes.
6. MJC, Respectfully, I don't think Clinton could handle the mouth gag.
7. Jeff B,
That's why it was only proposed. ;-o
8. King County Democratic Poll workers getting ready to address the media on what they observed during the 2004 elections.
9. Thats a picture of Patty Murry and Maria Cantwell preparing to speak at a Seattle Gay Rights conference on "bondage". Actually those chicks are hot, so it couldn't be Patty and Maria.
10. This will be all the rage if the Democrats win and can implement thier cut and run appeasement policy
11. I've been waiting for a couple of years now for the Pee Eww to collapse. Hurry and make it so.
12. Both of these babes unfortunately saw Joel Cornholey naked.
Obviously, they screamed in horror to the extent the corners of their mouths ripped out.
The tape covers the stitches.
13. Gregoire's new export Washington apples, import Frances adam's apples trade agreement with France.
Christine's vacation er trip details to be outlined as soon as it stops raining in Paris.
Somethings not right about them models.
14. After coming to the painful revelation that they are indeed a nation of spineless yellowbellies, the French government has announced its new military uniform. "Hopefully this will convince the insurgents to not kill or torture any of our soldiers that they may capture" stated a wistful French prime minister.
All that's missing is the white flag.
15. Caption: "Finally... a solution to the How To Date a Liberal Supermodel problem."
16. All that's missing is the white flag.
Posted by Burdabee at October 2, 2006 08:08 PM
It is there, ontop their head!!!! They have their bases covered.
17. I don't think Clinton could handle the mouth gag.
Have you heard Hillary speak?
18. I must be really fashion challenged, because I don't get it - seriously! Is this another slap at Christianity? Or is this aimed at Muslims who silence nuns? What's with the white trench coats and undies? Somebody please explain this to me, because I am obviously not sophisticated enough to appreciate it!
19. Peggy U: You're not the only one. I just don't see the point. Or else there are too many points. Maybe this is just the fashion world's answer to Goth? Or maybe it's a protest of the protest in Spain over too-skinny models, with those thingies covering their mouths. Who knows, or cares?
20. "US Military Unveils New Gitmo Nurse Uniforms"
21. What I have never been able to understand is how readily many swallow the notion that the JOA functions to prevent an antitrust situation by. I have come to view it as legalized duopoly - an antitrust violation in its own right. What value is there to consumers in propping up tweedle-dee and tweedle-dumber, since neither offers the news consumers of Seattle any real intellectual competition (and, therefore, intellectual accountability)? By forcing one to subsidize the other, the result is to use up all the oxygen and erect higher barriers to market entry for anyone who might think about offering a real (dare one say conservative, or at least a wee bit less collectivist-libertine than ST/P-I?) alternative? Put a stake in the heart of the JOA.
22. My caption: Those sure as heck aren't Columbo's daughters.
23. Ladies and gentlemen, we have a winner:
"US Military Unveils New Gitmo Nurse Uniforms"
nicely done, Obi....
24. What, the PI couldn't find any real fashion to cover? Claims of no liberal bias, yeah right, it's even in the fashion pages (they think sheep readers won't notice). No suprise readership is down, resulting in financial difficulties.
25. I have a caption. "SP ingnores headline news such as Condi Rice ignored warnings about Al Queda attack and then lied about it. Or, Republican house leadership knew about a sexual predator in their midst and ignored it, then lied about it. Or, US intelligence community concludes that Iraq war has increased the likelihood of terrorist attacks, and the White House tries to hide the report."
26. eric, honey... adjust your tinfoil hat. You clearly have it on too tight.
Oh, and try to stay on topic.
27. The JOA is simply a contract between private parties. That one is economically stupid and willing to contribute money to a competitor who also wastes these resources is a source of humor and wild-eyed bewliderment. Will the PI disappear if the Times is allowed to remove the subsidy? It really depends on the strategy of the PI's deep pocketed owner and it's willingness to indulge these fools in Seattle. They may have an asset to sell but it's operating model will likely have to change to survive.
28. "class lab outfit--young conservative woman in today's universities"
29. The new Democrats, all fluff, show and nothing to say
30. Ladies Liberty and Justice -- Sure we see the evil. Do you expect us to do anything about it? Not when we can again watch "Braveheart."
(I know, I'm a broken record.)
31. "The new sentence for captured Islamofascist terrorists - a sex change operation"
32. French Models Agree To More Revealing Burkas
33. Were Hot and Don't Talk. New Dress code for Congressional Interns for Democratic Members. Remember Only Republicans politician are Corrupt.
34. The garb of Religious Fascism.
your favorite brand of interchangeable monotheism.
35. caption:
"class international diversity & cross-cultural tolerance science project--forget the vinegar & baking soda--drop 1,000 of THESE in Iran and see what happens!" Goggles on!!!
36. interchangeable monotheism?
The Christ - The God of love encompassing justice.
Allah - A fallen angel who rebelled first against God and then against Lucifer (no honor among thieves). A god of 'justice' sans love.
Interchangeable? To the hard hearted, yes. To the elect - no.
37. Caption: Kirby and John Crossdress to protest I-912 Shut up Court Order Limiting Free Speech in the land that defined it.
38. This is inspired by Col. Hogan's comment in #37 (sorry, Colonel, but imitation IS the sincerest form of flattery): "Washington Supreme Court mandates new dress code for talk show hosts".
39. Re: entry #25
"Mental Health Staffers Don Controversial Uniforms in Effort to Institutionalize Blog Contributor 'One-Note-eric'"
40. This just in on CNN...Both Nancy Pelosi, aho did not become speaker of the house in 06, and Hillary Clinton, who lost in the 2008 presidential election, Protest their respective loses as an afront on Women's rights.
41. The Bush daughters convert to Islam under the guidance of recent Muslim convert George Wahabi Bush.
42. America's last two heterosexual women begin the long walk to the gallows as His Excellency Emperor Foley and Pro-Counsel Frank preside.
43. Microsoft complete its recall of models 24-36-24D and 24-38-24C for defective voice chips.
44. Unable to find any men with spines in America these two beauties vow never to smile again.
45. All talk and no action leaves Jack a very dull boy say super-patri-esses Baby and Doll. The dynamic heroines will withhold their dazling whites until Jack finds his back.
46. Persecuted at Smith College for being overly feminine Hope and Charity protest against the college's speech code.
47. Hoping to set a world record for silence Maude and Gertrude leave the presence of their publicist.
48. T-Mobile promotes total text messaging with two recently discharged voiceboxectomy volunteers.
49. Inner space - Where no women has gone before.
50. Osama Bin Laden's latest brides recover from their oral circumcision operations.
51. Ron Sims finally turns up with Michael Jackson after a long junket.
52. I can't top that one.
53. Captions:
"THEEESE will give ANY guy Spock-ears!"
Infidel burka-bombers.
54. caption:
"volunteer investigative journalists return from Brokeback Mountain"
55. yet another caption:
"cute?--sure!--but haven't mastered dental floss"
56. captions:
"Pandora's Vox."
"3M & Versace team up to design surgical masks--tests prove ineffective but damn stylish" Open heart pasties on drawing board. Designers also leak plans for a closed-back hospital gown-thong."
"student volunteers leave the vision-impaired med students' training facility in anger when asked to 'cough please' for routine glandular inspections"
"Two more former Arkansas governor's alleged victims bravely step forward to have their day in court. Book deals on the way. (not available in audio book format)"
57. "With a chain just long enough to keep them between the kitchen and the bedroom, it would be the perfect outfit for a good conservative wife.
58. How most women feel when they encounter cheesey losers like Jerry Branson!
59. What's his name, jdb/biteme/blowjob?
60. Jerry.
61. Again alphabet soup/Congressman Foley, I don't swing that way. But I am flattered that you always thaink about me and blow jobs. However, I'm not 16, and I don't play lacrosse, so you will have to find someone else to lather your attention on.
62. The new uniform for Democrats who have even a 1% disagreement with the netroots.
63. What's his name, jdb/biteme/blowjob?
64. captions:
"TSI unveils wandless travel dress guidlines to speed security lines--TSI recruiting quotas for male employees jumps 200%"
"U.S. military tests live surrender flag drones for use against next peaceful religion terror threat"
"gift packages sent on domestic animals to Brokeback Mountain return unharmed to sender--animals missing"
"resistant TB spreads to Paris runways from illegal alien refugees accepted in France"
"Arkansas-inspired chastity belts make a comeback in international fashion circles--study finds failure rates on upswing in DC"
65. Captions:
"Undercover PETA inspectors (faux leather belts) descend on local pig farm to inspect conditions; farmer hospitalized for collapsing from laughter"
"Toothless models sue for jobs under France's ADA-equivalent laws"
"U.S. military unveils new anti-terror interrogation weapon--stealth flashers"
"French sextuplet siblings, the No-evills, contact press to help look for missing sisters--Seeno & Heerno"
66. "library noise levels on upswing. enforcement officers arrest young male patrons at alarming rate. arrestees insist on full body searches."
"global warming linked to unusual growth in Euro women's moustaches. store shelves empty of facial wax kits"
67. "Fall fashions inspired by military's 'Don't Ask Don't Tell' policy."
68. No, wait. It's a fashion foul to wear white after Labor Day. Never mind.
69. "tamper-proof congressional pages reassigned. HR dept. mistakenly hires 'beauty queens' in place of 'boy teens'"
70. US Senator Maria Cantwell, and her decoy body double, Padme, illustrate her current strategy regarding debates with Republican challenger Mike! McGavick. Her campaign reasons that if she is gagged, then she can't say anything that will interfere with her "coast to re-election" strategy.
71. "local Seattle high school boys dump prom dates en masse due to dates' halitosis outbreak. in keeping with Seattle traditions, the boys proudly accompany each other to the prom."
"military archivists discover German Gen. Rommel's secret for waiting out desert dust storms in his bunker"
"hospital quiet zone rules enforced. oddly, instrument warmers go unused."
72. To 40: EEEEEEEWWWWWWWW. Do you really want to imagine a couple of wizened old Democrat skank hags like Nancy "Stretch-face" Pelosi and Hillary "Mudflaps" Clinton in outfits like that? That's just
naaaaaas-ty
To Eric: Just shut up, you irretrievably stupid liberal twit. Go look for your 20-dollar crack ho girlfriend in that crown jewel of liberal Seattle, your million-dollar toilet.
73. "No Smoking Allowed...Ever!
74. "car pool lane companion props--to open, break seal(s)"
"caution--do NOT deflate!"
"caution--do NOT inflate!"
"display use only--no passengers"
"party poppers--pull string--do not point at guests"
"this safe is time-locked. driver has no cash"
75. "scientists test the theory of an airhead-to-beauty coefficient. suspected air leaks monitored for 2 days."
