Society, that cruel beast, is still victimizing the weaker sex, as they are forced to please others before themselves. According to the Seattle-based instructor of the Seattle-based class "How To Be A Bitch 101."
Ana Saskia, a Seattle musician, ex-nanny, performance artist and "former third place winner of the Stranger Weekly Pizzazz! Talent Show," wants to help women in Seattle AND New York take charge of their lives; and cease being June Cleaver-esque doormats for men, employers, and sundry other female-hostile malefactors.
At least "H2BAB" isn't partially funded by a King County or City of Seattle grant. Not yet.
Thing is, the stay-at-home and part-time-working moms I know in Seattle are all quite happy with their lives (some odd thing having to do with raising young children, I guess); and yet they don't take any **** from anybody (a lesson reinforced once again, by parenting - strange how that works, huh?).
H2BAB 101 shows that Old School feminist tripe is still thought to be au courant in Seattle. That IS a "values" problem - with political dimensions, no less.
Then again, more than a few cultural offerings in Seattle tend toward the outlandish, though slathered with a thin veneer of ersatz progressivism.
Posted by Matt Rosenberg at February 25, 2005 07:27 PM | Email ThisNot one bit about leaving permanent marks in the world by bearing children. Having and raising children require the greatest amount of investment by any parent (time, money and love). But returns are truly priceless (esp. if you raise them to be responsible and they value having children at least as much as you do). Granted, they can end up all over the map, but chances are good that if you invest yourselves for them, then they will turn out to be more than OK, maybe even exceptional like Mozart or Einstein. But even something "ordinary" like seeing my children create intact, middle-income families would be something I would be proud of!
H2BAB can invest the same amount of time and "love" for her business but ordinary results won't be all that big deal (just paying her bills). She needs to have super extraordinary results to have some impact for the future. All I can say is good luck being a b****.
Posted by: DannyHSDad on February 25, 2005 09:00 PMUh-oh don't let him put a rock on your finger then you might be his b*%ch (slave) then you'd be a hipocryte.
Posted by: Adriel on February 25, 2005 09:05 PMProgressive, highly liberal, Gloria Steinem type filled the MSM media airwaves and print rags with a message to the young women of the 1970s that they were oppressed, June-Cleaveresque types and that they needed to break out of their unhappy male dominated world, or become uberwomen that both managed highly successful careers and perfect soccer mom rolls.
Of course these poor women didn't know what to make of this feminist, freedom message that was being rammed down their throats, many divorced their husbands looking for some new young liberated happiness, or started careers that put severe strains on their already busy lives, and marriages, etc. As they tried to embrace this feminist lifestyle, they mostly found themselves in the ex-wives club, lonely and unhappy. Off the top of my head, I can count ten friends of my mom who are divorced, single and lonely today.
Fortunately, as hardcore as these retro-Steinem HTBAB'chers are today, most of the woman I know in my generation (early Xers, mid 30s) have taken the time to have their fun, live their youth out, and have now settled in to motherhood at a later age. Many of them are stay at home moms who are very happy doing the important work of raising children with a parent who is always there for them and putting any career goals on hold until the children are well into school and beyond the critical attention stage.
Even with the small sample of my own experience and that of my friends, I've found my children and those of the other stay at home moms to be progressing at a much faster pace, much more socially adjusted, and much less susceptible to the child drug (ritalyn) onslaught that is attempting to correct all of the teacher diagnosed ills du jour, etc.
Ignoring the ridiculous message from the HTBAB'chers, my wife and our female friends are quite happy thank you very much.
Unlike my mother's generation of liberated and then depressed woman who I felt were unsuspecting victims of the first feminist movement, I think the woman in this second wave feminism know exactly what they are getting themselves into. I'm going to thoroughly enjoy watching these woman fall into the exact same empty and unhappy lives when they realize the folly of feminism and I'm going to have no sympathy for them whatsoever.
In short, these are indeed learning just HTBAB, and there's nothing more depressed and lonely than and old B.
Posted by: Jeff B. on February 25, 2005 10:20 PMWhat happened in the 70's was sold as an ideal that split everyone apart and left the kids holding the bag. It's intent was to make men and women enemies of each other. It doubled the consumer want list and because it was not based on working together to make the family unit work, it made a mess of the most precious of gifts, family came second. It shamed women, made evil beasts of men and left kids in the dark.
Posted by: Kathy on February 25, 2005 10:53 PMI agree with you and I don't think you have to worry much about this person reproducing. A good relationship comes from compromise and good communication. Not from constantly evaluating it from the place of whether or not one is being "bitchy" enough, or whether you are having to give of yourself for your relationship. Each person has to make an effort to make things work. If the giving or giving-in is too one-sided, of course, it is not a good relationship and probably won't last.
A woman who is so concerned about living up to her "bitchy agenda", so to speak, rather than working together with her loved-one to get through the day-to-day struggles of life is merely self-centered, and no more attractive to most guys than a totally self-centered man is to most women.
Jeff B.
I second Kathy's comment... well said!
My mother-in-law comes from that ilk. She divorced my Dad-in-law when he was no longer conducive to her moving up in her career and she started making more money than him. She is now an aging, lonely, increasingly bitter woman, who drives potential life-partners away with her selfishness and bitchyness. (is that a word?)
"A woman who is so concerned about living up to her "bitchy agenda", so to speak, rather than working together with her loved-one to get through the day-to-day struggles of life is merely self-centered, and no more attractive to most guys than a totally self-centered man is to most women."
I should add... unless she has big t*ts!
(Just kidding... I know, I know, that was a "groaner" ... no hate mail ladies, please!!!
God Bless!
In Robert Glover's book "No More Mr. Nice Guy" he also addresses this issue, and although he writes mainly from a male perspective, he makes it clear at the beginning that both men and women indulge in the being-too-nice syndrome.
He points out that it is a product of our social conditioning, and that we've been taught that it's not OK to be assertive, or to say "no", or to express our real feelings in our interactions with others. That would not be "nice". (a condition he labels as "toxic shame")
So many of us end up trapped in situations that we don't want to be in because we don't want to risk not being nice.
Women and men alike suffer from this malady. It is hardly gender-exclusive.
And I can speak first-hand about this... I own the book, needed it, am thankful for the wisdom contained therin, and thanks to it have done a lot of introspection and working on myself to keep from continually getting trapped in miserable situations because I have a hard time saying "no".
Other, more agressive (predatory?) people sense that in us and will attempt to assert their will over us at every turn in order to get what they want out of life, with no regard for how it affects us.
You're right! I guess I didn't look close enough. She WILL be offering classes for men.
Well, as long as I get the opportunity to learn to be a bitch too, it's ok. (grin)
(Although I think they've been offering that class in the state penitentiary for years... as in "You' my bitch now, m*****f*****!) (grin again)
Old maids who are miserable and just want more company.
Posted by: VCRW on February 26, 2005 09:08 AMOne reason I'll never live in Seattle again and much prefer East (what is now) King County. Perhaps there will be a day in the no too far distant future when King County East of Lake Washington will be a new county, which is long overdue ! Get those petitions ready to go - that's what it will take.
Posted by: KS on February 26, 2005 11:16 AMYes... we can only thank God x-tine gregoire was able to break free from that mold and take advantage of the rest of us.
Now we all can look at her and proudly proclaim:
"What a Bitch!"
Sounds like more pablum from the left. X-tine would fit into that category and we all know she wants to be a victim, as does Hillary. What a crock !
Posted by: KS on February 26, 2005 12:32 PM